Feminism | Posted by Sara Wong on 07/24/2013

On Being ‘Friends With Benefits’

Not quite.

The tricky thing about friends with benefits is that the lines you painstakingly set up get blurred so quickly; before you know it, there are no longer any lines discerning black from white — it is all just a pale shade of grey. You question all your emotions and when you start doing that, nothing is simple anymore. You constantly have to stop and think — the spontaneity that was once so attractive disappears. As the feelings increase, so does the hesitancy. And for me, the only time I felt truly comfortable was during sex, because we did not need to say a word. Too bad sex can’t last forever.

He knew he was hurting me — or rather, that our arrangement was detrimental to me. I hated …

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Feminism | Posted by Emily E on 07/22/2013

Why I Shared my Abortion Story With North Carolina Law Makers

My voice was trembling when I spoke the words “I decided to choose abortion.” I was telling my personal story and expressing my opposition of House Bill 695, a bill that would shut down all but one abortion clinic in the state of North Carolina. It started to hit me that I was in front of lawmakers, anti-choicers, supporters and television cameras. My legs started to go numb and my hands started to shake. I had to remind myself to look every lawmaker that has voted against women in the eye. Before I knew it, I was thanking them for their time and walking to my seat.

Every woman’s situation is unique, but my story is this: I was eighteen years old, a senior in high school, and I was …

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Feminism | Posted by Erica L on 05/31/2013

“Are You Sexually Active?” A Gay Girl Dealing With Heteronormative Doctors

Even in this day and age, my sex life stumps my doctor

Over the past few weeks, my schedule has been jammed with a clusterfuck of doctor’s appointments in an attempt to solve a stomach issue I’ve been dealing with for more than three years. I don’t typically shy away from doctors – I’m not the type to fear any unexpected diseases or cry over needles – but after a few appointments, I quickly grew tired of the answering the same question: “Are you sexually active?”

The answer is always, “Yes, with women only.” The response is always a blush, a stutter. Doctors’ hands always get clumsy; they are always unable to function in a coherent manner. Their notes always turn into scribbled gibberish.

I’ve always felt more painfully awkward …

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Feminism | Posted by Mareike S on 11/26/2012

Buying Condoms

why am I so embarassed to buy condoms?

I guess the title already gives you a good idea what this post will be about, but bare with me while I explain how exactly I got to writing this post and chose this title.

You could say I’m a grown woman. I’m a few years older than my country’s legal age, I live in my own flat several hundred kilometers away from my parents and, yes, if I’m not in a committed relationship, I sometimes hook up with a guy if he’s my type and things click.

Now, I’m on the pill (which luckily is really, really easy to get if you live in Germany or anywhere else in Europe as far as I know), but there’s no one-night stands without …

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Feminism | Posted by Sarah C on 09/28/2012

Let’s Talk About (Solo) Sex

masturbation is healthy!

Masturbation. Up until I was 17 years old, the word alone sent shivers down my spine – and not the fun type. I was petrified of my body and the pleasure I knew it could bring me. I saw touching oneself as a disgusting and deplorable act and thought only the most deviant of people would do it. Well, not actually, only the most deviant WOMEN would do it. Male masturbation seemed like a fact of life to me. I had many guy-friends who talked openly about porn, lotion, dirty socks etc, and I never thought anything of it, but the prospect of women masturbating made me sick.

Despite my aversions to self-pleasure, I still wanted sexual release. I was just as horny as any teenage boy, …

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Feminism | Posted by Chris X on 09/19/2012

On The Seriousness of Sexual Assault

Recently a girl in my area was walking to her car after sports practice with a boy with whom she was on good terms. She had flirted with him a little at a previous football game and he figured that meant she wanted to hook up with him. Earlier in the day, she had told him she might be interested in starting something, but on the walk back to her car she decided that she did not want to do anything sexual with this boy and told him so when he brought it up again.

While she was putting her bags in the trunk of her car, the boy opened the side door of her car and got in. He wouldn’t move and she thought he was just trying to …

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Feminism | Posted by Carmen M on 08/24/2012

“You’re A Virgin? I Really Respect You For That.”

virginity does not equal purity

As you get older, more and more of your peers have sex. I’m currently 19 and know plenty of people who haven’t had sex. But because of the media’s stereotypical portrayal of young people as raging sex addicts, many people my age exaggerate about their sexual experience either to impress others or just to appear as if they’re “keeping up”.

But honestly, I don’t want to rant about people my age and sex. Frankly, I don’t care whether or not you have or haven’t had sex. I lost my virginity in February during a one night stand. I was 18. I know the social repercussions of being a virgin (a ‘late bloomer’) as well as the repercussions of being a slut. What I want to …

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Feminism | Posted by Ama K on 08/17/2012

Sex and Christianity

Purity Rings: Not For Everybody

I was born and raised a Christian. From the time I came out of the womb, I was immersed in a highly religious family, and I lived most of my life with blinders on. I never really questioned anything and just accepted whatever was said to me. As I got older, I got more curious and began questioning the beliefs I was raised with more. I still believe in God and consider myself a Christian, but there are many aspects of my religion that I don’t agree with.

At church one Sunday, I went to the teen service and the topic that week was virginity and sex before marriage. I personally don’t plan on waiting until marriage, but I was interested in what was going …

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